the Diary of Elizabeth Childs
by UWLurkerZz
Summary: Soccer Cop. A diary like story of Elizabeth and her life with Alison. Rated for the ending. Other clones mentioned, along with some other characters. Possible spoilers.


_**A/N - Its a little something i made up during the Clonepocalypse. If you'll like it, i might continue with it. Hope you'll enjoy and sorry for grammar mistakes. **_

* * *

I couldn't sleep. Wounds still pretty fresh for me to even try to close my eyes. Even for a second. I was still afraid that this all was a simple dream. My eyes focused on someone that was breathing in a calm tempo, in and out, as if nothing was happening in the world. She slept very closely near me, my hands on her chest, holding her very closely. She was trembling, i could feel it. A huge thunder storm raged outside and i was wondering if she was actually afraid of the thunders ? Maybe that was the reason she was trembling so much. I tried to stand up, to maybe pick another blanket to cover her, but her hands caught mine, holding me in place.

I looked at her and she was still asleep. Why was she holding me though ? And more importantly how ? Her eyes were still closed, her breath still relatively even. It was strange to me. Then i heard her whisper. Elizabeth. I tried to look again but she held me so tightly, her grasp hard as iron. She was afraid, i could tell. I brushed away few of the remaining strains on her troubled, yet very beautiful face. Face that I've seen every single day in the mirror, but it could never be as beautiful as this one. She was perfect, and i knew it.

She whispered again. Stay. Stay. But where would i leave when my whole world was right in my arms, begging me to stay ? I had no reason to leave. This perfection was far too amazing to leave.

* * *

We played. Not in the naughty manner though. I went into the basement the other day and guess what ? We found an forgotten piano. Still working. Alison smiled and immediately started to clean it like nothing else mattered. She looked so ridiculous and so cute. I couldn't help it. I kissed her.

She waved her hands all angrily and in such a cute manner that she was all dirty and that so was i. That we should clean this up and then we can end up in the bed, on which i responded with Why not the table ? She smiled, but that didn't stopped her.

We argued whether to get it up or let it go in the basement. With Paul still on his journeys and who knows what meetings, the basement sounded like the best idea. For now. I promised Alison to move it up, once we're officially together. She smiled and kissed me, her lips always reminded me of that one thing i could never truly have. This one however, i promised myself that i will have. One day, i will have Alison Hendrix and her cute little kids, Gemma and Oscar, all to myself.

She asked if i know how to play, which was really ridiculous. Being a cop and everything, i was led in being a badass. To her surprise however, i nodded. We sat down, she brought a chair from the kitchen, and i played. It was such a long time since i last played my last tune, but it was like riding a cycle. One can never forget that. I played and she sang, what it was however, i had no idea. Her angelic voice totally making me unavailable to use my brain for what seemed like eternity.

That moment i knew i have fallen for her. Again.

* * *

She made me watch this ridiculous movie again. It had no sense. No beginning, no middle and no end. It had no shooting for crying out loud, and it was boring as hell. This pretty much explains why i never watch TV. This shit is non-watchable. Alison seemed to enjoy it however. Her breath gets more erratic every time her favorite characters get together, were it in romance way, or simply the talking way.

She holds my hand tightly as she presses against me and i can already feel her skin against mine. Just another reason for me to wish this movie would end soon. Her skin is so addictive. I want it all.

She looks up at me and she caught me staring. Wearing her more serious faces, she asked what was wrong. What was wrong ? Nothing was. It was perfect. I smiled and kissed her nose, pointing at the TV because her characters again made their appearance. She didn't looked however, her eyes focused on mine as she leaned in and kissed me. It felt different. She felt different.

The movie was long forgotten as i picked her from the sofa as my tiny bride, leading us both to the bedroom. With a quick glance, she looked back at the kids and yelled Don't be up for too late. I still cant believe how quickly Gemma and Oscar got over the fact that their mother is sleeping with another woman, yet alone her clone. These kids were simply as sharp and clever as their perfect mother.

* * *

The winter was cold, but it was much more warmer this year. Was it because of Alison and the kids were finally with me ? I have no idea. This whole year seemed so strange and..perfect. Killing Maggie, killing Paul and nearly killing Donnie, all that seemed to make me the person i am right now, and every time i look into the mirror, i see the face of a killer. I see guilt in my eyes and i see pain.

But every time i look into the mirror, the perfection itself appears right behind me, hugging me tightly, whispering sweet nonsense into my ear as she licks it afterwards. It is as if she knew how i felt. As if my thoughts were hers to read at anytime she wanted. Like there was nothing simpler in her life than to see what i think of. I asked her once what she sees in my eyes. _The woman i fell in love with_, she said. I denied that. I changed so much, there was no way i could still be the same Elizabeth Childs i was before this whole Clone stuff happened. I tried to leave but she held me so tightly, as if afraid to leave me alone just for a second. I looked into the mirror once again. I found the next pair of eyes, that were supposed to be the same as mine, staring at me, reassuring me. Making me feel wanted.

We spend today in front of our house, building snowmen, having snowball fights, making snow angels, the classic winter fun. It was strange. I haven't done this since my own childhood. We even teamed up against each other, and i must say, Oscar is quite the sharpshooter. We nearly won but, yeah, how could i not let the woman of my life win ? It was easier than i thought. Later that night we sat in front of the fireplace, Alison in my hands, kids playing, eating the fantastic meals Alison makes us every night. For the first time, since i left my parents house, i felt like i was a part of something that made sense in my life. Something that saved me from myself. Sure, Clone Club is a family like no other, but its different. I could never kiss Cosima goodnight or hold Sarah as i fall asleep. Alison though..

She made it right. She made me right.

* * *

Elizabeth Childs. Strange how weird it is to write my own name down. Elizabeth Childs. There. Again. My name never had the epicness, the badass tone for my profession. A cop named Childs. How ironic. Strange but.. i like it now. I like it how it leaves Alison's mouth when she talks, moans or even yells. _Elizabeth Childs, i told you so many times to take the trash away ! _She's so cute. So tiny and so angry. We laugh every time she raises her voice and that's causing her to raise it even more. Only my kiss seems to calm her down, however cheesy that might sound. She's simply.. She's Alison Hendrix, and she's perfect in every way possible.

Sometimes i write our names with our last names swapped. I found it amusing how absurd it sounds. Alison Childs. So strange and so weird but.. I like it. No. I _love_ it. Its a written proof that she's actually mine. Mine and no one else's. But how weird that sounds ? She already is mine. We're living together, we're raising the kids together and everything is perfect. I felt so weird after i wrote mine. Elizabeth Hendrix. Badass tone. Strong and noble and.. Would it really be so bad to want this ? To have a single surname that would bind our family together as one ? Would it really be so bad to have the world known, _This is Alison Childs and she's mine, _? I don't really know how to feel about this.

We took the kids into the park and, believe it or not, i made a choice. I told Alison that i have to buy something, i don't really remember what it was though, and she nodded, saying they would wait for me in the park. I stopped near the jewelry shop and i froze. Looking at those rings, something in my moved, re-shaped. It made me realize how foolish i was. Alison would never want that. Why would she ? She's happy already. No reason to try and change whats already perfect. I was about to leave but i couldn't. I'm so stupid, i actually went inside and bought the one ring that reminded me of Alison the most.

I'm so stupid, wasting money on something Alison will never see.

* * *

I'm an idiot and i know it. I actually wrote proposal lines down on a bloody paper. I wrote every single word that came to my mind and it was so, so stupid. I tore every single one of them. What was i thinking ? Why would she want any of this ? I hid the ring as best as i could but..She seen it. A small, tiny little box, but she never opened it. Instead, she questioned me with this ridiculous pose, waving hands and hard, stone-like voice. Me. A bloody cop. But it worked. I panicked and i screwed it all up, saying Cosima left it here for Delphine.

I could have sworn there was a hint of disappointment in those beautiful eyes of her. Was it over the fact that Cosima didn't asked for her help ? Or was it because she really believed it was for her ? I panicked again as she was leaving the room. I literally yelled, dropping on my knees like a total idiot, saying that its for her, forgetting every single goddamn line i had wrote over and over again on those damn papers. I just yelled, _Be mine._ And... She smiled. That's all what she did. She smiled and went to me and kissed me like there was no tomorrow. So sweet and gentle and it felt perfect. When she said, _Silly, i'm already yours, _i smiled, feeling tears going down my cheeks. Her thumb quickly and oh so very gently brushed them away, adding _But a little proof of that would never hurt_, and i felt my heart hammering like crazy. The woman of my life just agreed on the stupidest idea i ever had.

Later that night, wrapped in silken sheets, our bodies tired from our rather naughty activities, she giggled as she played with _her _ring. She confessed that she found all those stupid papers in the trash. She knew all along but she played the badass cop i was supposed to be.

How idiotic can love be.

* * *

We told the kids yesterday. They screamed and yelled and kissed both Alison and me, actually wishing us everything good in our lives. These kids were incredible. They were only adding to the perfection of our life with Alison. How could i ever live without any of them again. How did i live until this very moment ? How could i ever believe that Paul made me happy ? I was blind to the happiness this woman was offering. Right now however, my eyes are opened and they see the woman of my life.

We told my _sisters _today. Sarah rolled her eyes but she actually wished us good luck. Cosima, having the _finally _face, said that she knew it all the time. I believed her. All those side glances and _innocent _smirks just proved her point. Helena, she was the cutest. The psycho murderer cute. She actually asked us if we could have a jello wedding cake. Hard to imagine it myself. We all burst into laughter, poor Helena only staring, asking what was wrong. Our little precious Kira promised to draw us a pretty picture as she hugged us both, quickly returning to play with Helena's hair.

Felix and Delphine, our non-clone members, cheered with us, Delphine giving Cosima side glances on which Cosima looked my way, _thanking me_ for this whole mess. I cant even imagine Cosima in a wedding dress. Hell, i can't even imagine myself in wedding dress.

Rachel was..Rachel. Actually, she was more than that. She nodded and offered to take the wedding into her hands, setting everything up, from colors to the music. This surprised me. And not only me, because Sarah chocked on her beer, spitting it all over the floor. Cosima just had her eyes wide open like she used to. Alison stopped her though, saying that she wanted her wedding to be perfectly made by herself. I was still staring at both of them, not even imagining the whole ceremony. Suddenly however, i couldn't wait for it.

* * *

Alison send the kids to her mother tonight, said she wanted me all for herself tonight. She prepared a nice, romantic dinner, having her best dress on, candles lit and the cheesy music in the background. I asked her if she wanted to go out instead but she didn't. I think she's still very careful in the public, being with her clone and everything. And i understand. Its not easy and i don't want to push her to anything. Having her with me, in my arms, was the most important thing for me. I couldn't give a damn about what the society thinks about us.

We finished the absurdly delicious dinner filled with wine and excitement. We were both so horny it hurt. It was evident. As we danced, as i held her against my chest from behind, hands on her hips, lips on her neck, her perfume filling my system, i was totally dazed. How was she so perfect ? So soft and so delicious ? I waited no more to find out.

We ended up having our first round against the table. Not very romantic, i know, but seeing the lust in her eyes, i lost control. I put her on top of it, literally shredding the pretty, dark violet dress from her, instantly going for her breasts, cupping them, kissing them. The silken dress was long forgotten as i took her with my mouth, her nails digging into my scalp, the grip tightening with my every lick. She moaned, even screamed my name as i finished her off, feeling the bitter nectar finally hitting my mouth. Alison maybe an excellent cook, but this was by far my favorite meal of all. I raised up, kissing my way up her delicious and perfect body, kissing every inch of her sweat covered skin. She kissed me hungrily, taking what was left from my mouth, moaning as she tasted herself on my tongue. I looked into her eyes and i could see her primal apart awakening.

I've literally fucked her against the bedroom doors, that was how excited i was. It was unbelievable. I've never been so hungry and so..horny. She scratched my back so furiously i could feel blood running down my back and i enjoyed it. So much. She looked into my eyes, silently asking if it was alright. She always did. Always afraid of hurting me. My answer came when i pinned her in the bed, making love to her like there's no tomorrow. Cuffs, feathers, ice, champagne, whipped cream, even hot wax and much, much more. We've done it all. Without a single hint of shame. She asked for it and i gladly gave her everything. All those years with Donnie, i could understand why she was so primal time to time. There was simply passion that was bottled for far too long, that needed to be released time to time. We ended up fucking the entire night, not caring for anything but our pleasure and our release.

The morning after was no different. Somehow there was still the needed strength to continue. I woke up and heard the shower running, images of water running down Alison's naked and beautiful body instantly attacking my mind. Flawless. The woman, _my _woman was simply flawless. She was in there, washing away the mixture of yesterday's activities. I saw those bright red marks on her back that my nails caused and not a single hint of regret hit me. Letting my already loose robe fall to the ground, i went behind her, gently hugging her from behind, hands resting on her chest. She jumped a bit but my warmth quickly calmed her. She very well knew who it was. _Perfect,_ i whispered into her ear, biting it lightly afterwards. I ran my tongue down her back, trying my best to avoid the red marks. It wasn't long before she got me pinned against the shower glass wall, making me hers again.

Good thing the kids were out. The weekend we just experienced was something i will remember for a very, very long time.


End file.
